A friend of his was coming into town. He mentioned it briefly, so I could take a note and add to my calendar. As the date approached, I sensed retraction. He wouldn't have admitted it. I didn't ask at first. I allowed him to come forth on his own time, his own terms. When the day arrived, I took a head start on him and got ready. After all, I was going to meet a woman who I already knew he'd dated previously. For some reason I was okay with it. I was confident because I was his present and therefore his past meant nothing. Repudiation. He wandered until he finally said it, "I'm not sure I want you to come with me." Bewildered, I asked him, "why? What's in your mind that has kept you wandering for the past few days?" Nervous and apprehensive, he said "She got married. I never told you about her, but I use to really like her and she just strung me along. Now, I find out through Facebook that she's married. She hasn't even told me and I just don't know how I will react when I see her." As I tried to look at him with loving eyes, I was just confused. Still, I looked at the situation in a way a supportive fiancé would or should. I felt deceived, heartbroken. I knew that if this is how he felt, that meant that I was not the only one living in his heart. I said, "I understand that you feel this way and I hope this will bring you clarity or at least what you're looking for." I decided to stay home. But he insisted on me joining him. I would've stayed, but a part of me wanted to stand by him and another part of me wanted to meet this other woman and find out what was so special about her that it could awaken emotions of the man I chose.
We arrived and while I looked around for reasons to disappear and never come back, I went inside that restaurant and acted like the most confident and special woman. After all, he chose me too. I could see his hands and his attempt to keep them steady. But his mouth never lies. That's what made me fall for him in the first place. His lips had a slight jitter ever time he felt nervous. Was I in the way of something? He sat next to her and I had a front row ticket across from her. She was physically beautiful, but I had no respect for her. She strung along the man I loved and left him heartbroken. We spent hours with her and her colleagues. At the end of the night I thought, "why did come here?" How could allow myself to get this far and not even realize that I too had been heartbroken?
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